Stop and think for a moment of all the decisions you make in a day. As you do, you’ll notice that some of them are so automatic you might not even consider them to be decisions.
- Do I get up with the alarm or sleep in?
- Which hand do I use to hold my toothbrush?
- Do I even want to brush my teeth today?
- Do I wash my hair first or last?
Some decisions need just a moment’s contemplation:
- What do I want to eat for dinner?
- What do I need to do today?
- Should I cut the grass?
- Should I do the dishes tonight?
- Do I clean the house today?
And others require deep thought and contemplation.
- Should I quit my job?
- Should I ask him/her to marry me?
- Do I want to have children?
- To whom do I leave my vast inheritance? (ahem…)
When faced with having to make a decision, many factors come into play: your values, your beliefs, past experiences and your emotional feelings on the subject of decision.
Every decision you make results in a set of responses or consequences. For example, if you, as a child, formed a belief that brushing your teeth twice a day is important because it keeps your teeth clean and your breath smelling fresh, then it’s likely that you decide each day to brush your teeth twice a day. In the long term, the decision to regularly brush your teeth results in the prevention of tooth decay which helps to prevent tooth loss and possible infection.
Once, while staying at a hotel, I realized at 2:00 a.m. that I had forgotten my toothbrush. Exhausted, I tried to fall asleep without brushing. Eventually, I had to call down to room service to bring me a toothbrush. I just couldn’t sleep without performing my nightly ritual. My beliefs about oral hygiene influenced my decision to find a toothbrush rather than just going to sleep with dirty teeth.
Now let’s take a look at how decision making affects your weight loss success.
First a cold dose of reality. If you are overweight, out of shape, have low levels of energy and are unhappy with your appearance, there’s really just one simple reason for it…
You decided to be. Every single day.
- You decide what you will eat and what you won’t eat.
- You decide whether or not you will exercise your body.
- You decide what type of person you will be.
- You decide to use food to self-medicate your depression.
- You decide whether or not to associate with unhealthy, negative people.
- You decide whether or not to educate yourself on your body, on food, on exercise.
It’s your decision. Period.
Your initial reaction may be to say I’m full of crap; that you’re overweight because…you have a slow metabolism….you’re over 30…40…50…you’re genetically disadvantaged. If this is the case, let me point out that what you’ve done is decided to use these excuses as the basis for your reasoning as to why you haven’t achieved weight loss success. Millions of genetically disadvantaged people over the age of 30 have lost weight and kept it off. Millions of people have overcome countless challenges to improve their health and fitness.
Too often, people decide to lose weight and get in shape but fail to reach their target. There may be many reasons for this, but often it comes down to their decision making process.
Think of decision making as a continuum. On one end you have apathy – a feeling of indifference. Whatever the decision, you really don’t care one way or the other.
On the other end of the spectrum is unwavering intent. It’s saying that no matter what anyone says or does…no matter what happens around you, your decision to do something will stand.
The strength of your decision is determined by the strength of your values, your beliefs and your emotions surrounding the subject of your decision.
Let’s say for example that you’ve formed a strong belief that no matter what you do, you can’t lose weight. Your belief could be based on your age, your (in)ability to exercise, a medical condition, your genetic makeup…whatever. Yet every day your clothes feel tighter, you have less energy and you feel like a piece of road-kill. You start thinking…
- “I need to lose weight” or
- “I should do something about my weight” or
- “I have to lose weight to look good for the pool party”.
Reading those statements, how do you feel? Do you feel inspired? Do you feel ready to go out and conquer the world? No? I didn’t think so.
When you say you “should”, “have to” or “need to” lose weight, it suggests that the decision is not one you want to make. Maybe you feel obligated to lose weight – to look like someone else. Perhaps your spouse is making you feel like you need to lose weight.
Whatever the reason, your decision is based on external factors or pressures and therefore your commitment level is low. If you decide to begin a weight loss program at this level of commitment, you’ll likely meet with frustration and failure. You may experience some success, but it will rarely be long lived.
You must decide that losing weight is something you really want to do…for YOU…not your spouse…not your best friend…not your Doctor…for YOU!
Climbing The Ladder of Commitment
What if instead of saying, “I need to lose weight”, you said “I want to lose weight”?
Say it again with me, slowly…and with meaning…
“I WANT to lose weight.”
Again. This time say it out loud. Okay, last time. even louder. Great!
How do you feel when you say those words? Do you feel more empowered? Do you feel more positive about losing weight?
The difference between “I have to” and “I want to” is monumental but you can raise your level of decision even higher. How? By deciding…
“I am losing weight”
“I want to” is a wish. “I am” states a fact. It leaves little doubt as to your intentions, doesn’t it?
Making a committed decision to do what it takes to achieve your health and weight loss goals helps you to prioritize your activities. Drinking with your friends after work now takes a back seat to working out. Having a beer with the boys after a round of golf is replaced by a refreshing glass of soda water with lime.
It’s so easy to get caught up in trivial, time-consuming tasks. When your decision to lose weight comes from a place of fact, of unwavering intent, you do the things that will bring you closer to achieving your goal and put off those activities that keep you busy but add very little to your overall feeling of fulfillment.
For example: Let’s say it’s the weekend. You’ve got a long list of things to do, but not enough time to get it all done. Sound familiar? At the end of the day, it comes down to washing the dishes or working out. What do you choose? Or what if you get home after a long day at work. You feel exhausted. Do you push yourself through a workout or plop down onto the couch? When your decision to lose weight becomes strong enough, your other decisions become easier to make. Your priorities make the decisions for you.
In my experience, many women have a very difficult time putting themselves first. They assume the role of family martyr, putting everyone else’s needs before theirs. I know the instinct to do this is strong, but let me say this:
If you make your health your top priority, it creates a ripple effect in the rest of your life. If you are healthy and in-shape then you will have more energy for your family, your friends and your career. Or put another way…
You can only take care of others if you take care of yourself.
Thanks for the read!